Okay, Who’s Been Drinking?

Remember Mandy Baldwin? I guess she’s still around but her last two books have not exactly hit the NYT bestseller list. Anyway, back in May of 2014 I wrote about her and her sleazy review tactics, twice on the 11th because I had to include a response to the Ugly Green Hate Site and once on the 14th because TUGHS just couldn’t seem to grasp what I was talking about and were flinging their usual poo with all the hysteria and enthusiasm they could muster.

Today I was skimming my emails and found this little gem:

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Because, really, not posting anything on Mandy in over 4 years is the very definition of a stalker. (rolls eyes) And as for being anonymous, hello? Sometimes you just have to wonder how someone so stupid has managed to survive. And, of course, 9MM  is him?/her?self anonymous.

I needed a good laugh and 9MM (really?) provided.

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The Authors Guild and the Trademark Fracas

Author Kevin Kneupper brought this to my attention on Twitter yesterday. This post is an absolute must read for everyone because, sooner or later, we’ll encounter some misguided author who firmly believes s/he can to pull a Faleena over a word or title and we all end up watching another boozy video by someone who thinks eliminating all competition is the pathway to fame and the #1 spot on the NYT best seller list.

And since I invoked her name, Faleena has reluctantly settled and is withdrawing her trademark applications. She made a (mercifully short) video where she plays the martyr (does she ever not ) and wistfully murmurs about trying to protect her family, the Cockers, who are fictional) and how she was brutally attacked for doing so.

Refresh my memory, wasn’t she the one sending out fake cease and desist letters to indie authors using the word “cocky” in their titles? Wasn’t she the one who managed to get Amazon to remove books using “cocky”? Wasn’t she the one that applied for a TM for the word cocky in a specified font that wasn’t hers to TM? But she’s the victim, riiiight.

Anyway, go read it and save the link somewhere for when you encounter the next Faleena or Michael Scott Earle.

 

 

The Faleena Video- Pt I

Okay, Dear Readers, let’s get this video flogged. Sorry that I can’t post it but it seems Princess Pickled got it taken down everywhere- except for those copies we all are keeping in our libraries in case they’re ever needed, say in court when she tries to deny her actions or her words.

I think she thinks dramatic pauses will make her mess look better. It just makes it cheesy and already I wonder about her acting ability. But I forgot this:

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Threatened to the point of dangerous? Does not even make sense and she tries for a “significant look”. Tries and fails because- whiskey. What a llama.

Then she “beseeches the money grabbers to back the fuck off “.  Okay, princess seems to not know the definition of beseech because you would not “beseech”  in the same sentence where you insult those you are beseeching and then order them to “back the fuck off” but then we have to take the whiskey into consideration.

Big dramatic pause, Faleena’s mind.

Okay, she has this smile, it looks sort of like a shark, all teeth and weird eyes. She claims to be building a brand and gives the camera the smile and you try to ecide what brand she’s going for, Smirnoff? Baileys? Maker’s Mark? She’s building a brand, Dear Readers, and you, you know who you are, are writing. One. Book. Then the whiskey tricks her into saying that that one book off of which you are piggybacking her series.  I replayed it to make sure and, yes, that is what she says.

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Then she assures us that it’s not all writers using her success. But how is she going to distinguish between who is and who isn’t? I guess the answer to that is if a writer isn’t Tara Crescent then they probably aren’t using her success for their own monetary gain.

States the obvious more writing=more money so go write then leaps to leave  my fans, family, models alone.

And then  comes one of the most bizarre moments  she starts saying,”shes the bully she’s the bully” while making  stabby gestures and then a noise somewhere between a cat hacking up a hairball and a minah bird got caught in a garbage disposal.

Calls those who disagree with her decisions sick bastards for bothering people cause you know nothing is saner than a drunk woman making stabby motions on a video where she’s claiming to be building her brand.

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She again demand we focus on her (something she really likes).

Did she really say make your face? What’s behind the avatar, heda tilt, mmm-hmm “you know who you are”. Man, she really is jealous of Tara.

And it’s her who made this mess, but only in the sloshy brain of a jealous, jealous woman.

Everybody likes her world, her readers are great (but easily confused and sadly unsophisticated) and wouldn’t do what we have done. Yeah.

Reads a card of thanks about her book. So there.

Reads several cards. So there and there and there again.

I thought I would enclose this ss of a card for Faleena,

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Cause I read a couple excerpts from your books, sweetie, and believe me, you have my sympathy. Damn.

But her people, they love her her writing, her looks, her winning personality.

Her books save lives. Nothing new here. Once again, Laurell K Hamilton makes the same claim. I’ve read this claim from authors and usually authors that write crappy books. I have to wonder if the people who claim these books save their lives read them and then think, “Well damn, my life is bad but not as bad as this book,” then go off to breakfast and a new, better life.

What are we doing is working against goodness and light.

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Then she indulges in some wishful thinking, saying there are shadows on authors we love and they are going down because less people are following them because of the actions of their followers (us).  Now I hate to point out mistakes to a drunk (no I don’t) but there is an uptick in books sales for authors you have attacked and I’ve read a number of posts from your now former followers.  I myself have purchased The Cockiest Cowboy Whoever Cocked, Cocktales, Cocky Doctors, and Cocky Firefighters.

people don’t like us, and once again she’s projecting.

Only hurting ourselves not her, people won’t buy your books. Well, I don’t write books so I’m not at all bothered and let me just point out again the four books I bought from authors I assume she’s trying to refer to.

She didn’t bully anyone, she sent private, legal cease& desist letters and she’s mad they were posted but what anyone wants to do with their mail is not for her to dictate. I am quite sure she didn’t want her lame-ass attempts and intimidation posted for all to snicker at.

She repeats the whole “she’s the bully” with stabby motions  and hairball and minah bird noises. Holy shades of Psycho.

There are good people out there  and she’s sold half million book in series and it’s not porn. I’m picturing the floor around her looks like this:

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World’s in a sad place and we’re an example of why.  Weepyness.

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And then she bounces back to demanding we keep attacking her, please, she doesn’t mind.

But leave the innocents alone.

She’s just a good business woman trademarking her series (and a common use word), her font (which isn’t hers and she can’t legally TM). Please explain the good business of being drunk online.

You know who you are she’s done lunch with you. Meaningful look.

Ah, it becomes very apparent she means Tara.

Okay, now she says “maybe your writing is amazing” and I’m thinking she is so jealous of Tara’s writing and success that I wouldn’t want Tara to be left alone with her.

A weak person destroyed her instagram account.

Millions of readers wouldn’t do that (but they did) and those millions are her tribe. Wait, she has a tribe of millions but sold only half a million books?

She tries to claim again we are destroying our authors  by hating her. Here she makes a hand to the hair gesture that screams she knows it’s a lie. And once again we have Projection By Faleena as she claims her readers write other authors saying they are calling Faleena’s readers stupid, and their kids are stupid because they are autistic and autistic is called stupid. I would like to think she isn’t calling autistic individuals stupid but she’s drunk and after reading her post on what women should do to empower men I no longer can give her the benefit of the doubt. Read it here .

She fails to see what’s wrong with trademarking ‘cocky”. Yep, it’s about Tara. She’s furious about Tara’s cocky books. Tara started a cocky series but Faleena is building a brand and Tara’s just riding her coattails to stardom. She needs to go write a better book and leave Faleena alone with cocky.

She demands we give her hate, please.

Well, first she tried to shame everyone then she tried to scare everyone about losing support for their favorite authors and neither has really worked. Too much to drink to really make it work.

At 13 minutes one last word.

Long sad pause, soft voice, bring it she can take it (home from the nearest liquor store).

She’ll be writing (Dear gods, no, but if she must then I hope she sobers up first)

Longggggg pause then 1 more thing.

Wonders if that (her vid) was okay. Um, how do I put this? NO.

Not Safe For Work No GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Swearing fights, with her inner sober self. Sober loses bigtime.

There’s 2 minutes I won’t get back, more sighing and squirming, now 4 minutes I won’t get back.

OMG, she gets that life’s hard. She’s been through some shit, the last 4 days are nuthin.

Bring it, with crooked finger.

Now she loses track of what she started out with and starts handing out advice on how to live our lives. While drunk.

She understands we got opinions, we are all good,  rambles on, on, on, on, on, on, I guess about writing for a living. What happens if we want something try and fail?  If we all did what we want there would be no hate.  But, Faleena, what if we want to kill people?

Then this quote:

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We have lost our way and our minds, we can have everything our hearts desire. And now she’s talking Master Class. This is 31 minutes, 50 seconds. There is an hour and 12 minutes left, i really want a drink but watching Faleena good example of a horrible warning I don’t think I can.

More after chocolate.

 

 

 

Faleena Hopkins Denies Revised

She’s baaa-ack! This was on her Twitter this morning:

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Mmmm,yeah. Right. Sure. It seems Princess Pickled might have a short term memory problem so some kind soul helpfully posted this:

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From the replies it doesn’t seem like other authors and readers are buying what she’s trying to sell.

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There are more replies on Twitter but as you can see things still aren’t going in the direction Faleena wants. it would be a huge help if she didn’t try to claim one thing in court and the opposite in her author group and on Twitter.

So, are her readers so unsophisticated that they can’t tell if who wrote a book with the word “cocky” in the title? Do they believe all books with a cover model used by Faleena means the book’s author is plagiarizing Faleena? Is it truly impossible for them to return an ebook?

Does she keep them locked in the trunk of her car?

And what’s with this stuffing of her books?

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Paul really wants to know about book stuffing. Do you? Linda Hilton has written an excellent post here .

Revision or addition:

Hold the phone, Faleena, Wells Fargo ? Not exactly the workplace to brag about.

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Publisher All Romance Ebooks: Closing Hits New Low In Stealing From Authors

Author Celia Summers has posted an excellent piece on blogcritics about the sudden closing and less than savory actions of ARe.

The ebook industry has undergone several transitions in the past few years, where authors have become increasingly victimized by e-pirates, vanity presses, and scams designed to keep writers from making money on their intellectual property. Earlier today, December 28, 2016, the industry hit a new low when longtime e-tailer All Romance E-Books (Are), LLC (with its non-romance genre partner Omni Lit) released a surprise notice to its authors and publishers. ARe’s CEO and owner, Lori James, announced that the retailer was closing its doors in three days’ time.

What makes this so terrible is not the fact that they’re closing. What makes this so terrible is how they’re doing it:

We will be unable to remit Q4 2016 commissions in full and are proposing a settlement of 10 cents on the dollar (USD) for payments received through 27 December 2016. We also request the following conditions:
1. That you consider this negotiated settlement to be “paid in full”.
2. That no further legal action be taken with regards to the above referenced commissions owed.

Wait…what?

Link to the full article.

Torquere Press Is Closing

Writer Beware announces another publisher is closing, like EC for Books (Ellora’s Cave) Torquere Press has spent the last year or so giving part of their authors nothing but problems so this is not exactly a surprise. And like EC even the closing will give their authors nothing but another massive headache.

Posted by Victoria Strauss for Writer Beware

Troubled publisher Torquere Press is closing. Owners Kristi Boulware and Joanna Talbot announced their decision yesterday in an email that will doubtless infuriate many authors, but probably won’t surprise them:

We have thought long and hard about where things are with Torquere and made the very hard decision that we need to begin the process of closing this chapter of our lives….We have done everything we could to turn things around but with the saturation in the industry, the financial hardships we are in, my health in constant decline along with the negativity we have had hurdled our way. We feel like we are currently fighting an uphill battle.

For the complete text see here.

Just getting picky here but shouldn’t that be hurtled not hurdled?

Small Press Storm Warnings: Torquere Press, Caliburn Press, Month9Books

If you’re an author or a reader you really should check out Writer Beware. Strauss has posted an update on the problems various small presses are causing and/or experiencing.

Posted by Victoria Strauss for Writer Beware

A roundup of publishers about which I’ve recently received serious complaints (all of them documented).

TORQUERE PRESS

At the end of 2014, the founders of Torquere Press–a well-regarded small publisher established in 2003–turned the company over to new co-owners: Kristi Boulware and Joanna Talbot.

Before the change in leadership, Torquere had been trouble-free (or at least, not generating author complaints). It didn’t take long for that to change. In early 2016, a little more than a year after the new owners took over, reports began surfacing of royalty payment problems. More reports showed up over the summer, even as Torquere participated in Twitter pitch contests to find new manuscripts. Also during the summer, Kristi Boulware was arrested on a hot check charge, allegedly after payment to one author bounced.

For more see here.